The Day Of Reckoning Is Near

Have you looked at a calendar recently? Do you realize what this Friday is? That's right lady and gentlemen, it's NHL Draft Day!

A little team I like to call "The Edmonton Oilers Of Edmonton, Alberta, Canada, North America, Earth" or "Oilers", for short, will be smoothing things over with their fan base by selecting first overall in the Entry Draft on Friday. It's a small token of appreciation shown to us fans by the team after last season's something something that I don't want to talk about. *COUGH* LAST *COUGH* PLACE *COUGH* SHITTIEST TEAM EVER *COUGH* FML *COUGH*

Basically, unless you live under a rock and haven't heard, there's two kids hoping to be selected 1st overall: Taylor Hall and Tyler Seguin.

"Who do you think the Oilers will pick?" you ask.

Well, since you brought it up, I believe the Oilers will select Taylor Hall. Here's a list of reasons why I think this way:

1. Bob McKenzie from TSN said he thinks Hall is the best pick for 1st overall.

2. ....that's all I've got.

Basically I don't have a clue which kid the Oilers should take. I've seen Hall play a couple times on TV and I have never seen Seguin play. I can't base my judgement of which kid is better based on my drunken hockey watching so I have to rely on people that have seen the kids play multiple times, with their own eyes. Bob McKenzie doesn't just spout off his opinion based on which kid he "thinks" will be better - he actually uses linear regression analysis and statistic baselines to formulate an accurate projection of who the best pick will be. ...ok, that's total bullshit....but what Bob does is interview scouts from all over the damn place and get their opinions of who the best pick is. So, by doing this he gets a broad spectrum of opinions and I think a more accurate "projection" of who should go first and why.

Honestly, I don't care which kid the Oilers take. Either one of them will be a nice cornerstone piece to initiate an honest to god rebuild of this team. No more chasing old balls free agents that want to sign in some city with palm trees. No more trading away youth for "experience" which we've all learned is just a euphemism for "10 to 13 games before a season ending shoulder injury occurs." No, it's all about the draft and developing the youthful core nucleus of a team that will grow and learn together from here on out.

One more thing - did you guys know that TSN is showing a behind the scenes documentary about the Oiler Brass and their trials and tribulations as they prepare for the upcoming draft? It's called "Oil Change". It will have footage of the Oiler big wigs interviewing the top prospects Tyler and Taylor as well as behind closed door meeting footage of the GM arguing with his scouts about who's the better pick. It will also supposedly show footage following Tyler and Taylor around from their visits to Edmonton over the past couple of weeks. Rumor has it we'll also see the inside of the Wayne Manor (Daryl Katz's house). I can't wait to see it. It's going to air Thursday night (June 24th) at 7PM MST on TSN.

-TB

Eberle Mancrush Starts in 5, 4, 3, 2...

Photo above: Canadian Players huddle around Jordan Eberle for warmth.

Most likely because he was on fire in the 12-1 romp over Norway

at the WHC in the southern German city of Mannheim on May 14, 2010.

1G, 4A, +3

Team Canada Player of the Game

I love this kid. I know...I know...It's only Norway. I will hold off on the statue and parade for now.

Still, I think the future looks bright in Edmonton with MPS, Eberle and Hall/Seguin knocking on the door.

-TB

ZOMG ZOMG ZOMG ZOMG

*swoon*

Eberle gets his big shot this morning. I honestly don't expect anything crazy. I'm just happy to get to see him play with some real NHLers. I'm curious how he'll look.

Giddy up!

-TB

Is This Thing On?

Hello there.

Where do I begin?

Well first off, how about a little story as to where in the hell this lovely corner of the Internet went over the past few months...

Our story begins around month two of the 2009/2010 Regular Season of my beloved Edmonton Oilers. Up to that point, there was still the annual hope in the air that the Oilers could somehow churn out another mediocre-barely-make-the-playoffs-in-fact-not-even-make-the-playoffs-but-give-a-good-showing-over-the-final-twenty-games effort. Turns out that was nothing but a pipe dream, as the Season From Hell™ was gathering steam...and lots of it.

Injuries, the flu, mono, concussions, surgeries, DUI's, general malaise, constipation, urinal tract infections...you name it, it happened. Not to mention what the Edmonton Oilers went through! Ok...kidding...that was all them. The team could not buy a break, even with the billions of dollars in Katz's piggy bank. They sucked. I grew weary.

As the losses mounted and the roster took on an ECHL flavor this feeling of "I don't give a shit" began to take a hold of me. It was rough. As a die hard Oiler fan for many many moons I can tell you this feeling of not caring about my team was quite foreign to me. As a result of the Oilers' Shitshow™, the "Who Saw This Coming!?!" you all know and love took a direct blow to the post count. My posts came further and further apart, eventually with me not even caring enough to post something like "at least we have the 1st overall pick!1!!" But no. A picture I found of Jordan Eberle was my last post...World Juniors? Seriously? WOW.

It's sad, because I'm the guy that buys all the PPV games no matter what...even after the Smyth Trade™. Not this year. I'm the guy that plans his social calendar around off-nights of the Edmonton Oilers. Not this year. I'm the guy that plans his social calendar around on-nights of the Edmonton Oilers. "Let's meet for drinks at (insert name of place with TV's that show Oiler games)" I would say. Not this year. I'm the guy that goes to as many games as I can possibly afford. "I don't need to eat this month." I would say. Not this year. I went to two games ...and they were free.

Now that the Season From Hell™ is long over and I have had some time to heal. I feel my love for my team creeping back in. There's a lot to look forward to for next season. I mean...they can't get any worse, really. There's a pretty good draft pick coming in. Some young prospects will be knocking at the door. Tambo is supposedly done assessing and plans on cleaning some house this summer. It can't possibly turn out any worse. Can it? I don't think so. I don't expect them to be a playoff team next season, but I do expect them to not be DEAD FUCKING LAST again.

So, with that all in mind, this place is NOT dead. It is still here. I will still toss up my beautiful photoshop creations. I will still spew what ever is in my head out into this blogging machine and I will do it a little more regularly. I am, afterall, The Towel Boy. I have fans. (Thanks Mom!)

Speaking of The Pint - NationDraft Playoff Editions.... Have you seen where I currently sit?

That's right. 7th. Who saw this coming!?!

But I'm gonna admit. I am royally fucked after this round of the playoffs is over. Look at my team:

Yeesh.

Well, it was good while it lasted.

-TB

A Real Canadian Hero

I stumbled upon this gem on the old internets today. Classic.

Two Words: 1. AWE. 2. SOME.

There's been a lot of talk in the Oilogosphere since the end of the World Junior Championship about Jordan Eberle. Some fans think he is the savior that this team needs. Some have a more measured outlook that we should wait and see how he looks playing in the NHL before we plan the ticker tape parade. Then there are other absolute buzzkilling trolls that call him a bumb and a loser. We ignore those guys. Well, I do at least.

I'm in the "let's wait and see how he does against NHL players" group. I'm not stupid and I realize that good Jr. numbers don't always translate into elite level NHL numbers. For that reason alone I haven't ordered my Oiler jersey with "EBERLE 14" on the back. That being said...I wouldn't hesitate to get a Team Canada jersey with "EBERLE 14" on the back.

Nobody can question the ability of this kid to score clutch goals in very tense situations on the world stage in the name of Canada. He's a gamer. I just hope he can translate some of the magic he's performed on the Jr. stage in the NHL. Time will tell.

GOILERS! (DFF)

-TB

THIS! IS! KHABIBULIN!!!!

In honour of Nikolai Khabibulin reaching the 300 win mark last night with his shootout victory over the Dallas Stars...I present to you this wonderful masterpiece. I spent a good 3 minutes on this one, so enjoy it. I have no story or written words to go with it...so I'll leave you with a big, happy "GOILERS!!1!!!"

-TB

Da Stars

Pictured Above: A Star.

I'll make this quick. The Stars fly into RX1 tonight. The Oilers are looking to shake off the feelings of despair that they most undoubtedly felt after watching Khabibulin pull a Horcoff (read: Whiffing on a puck.) to end their season opener on a bit of a downer.

The Powerful and Mighty Oilers will be looking to absolutely hand it to the Marc Crawfordly looking Dallas Stars this evening. This game also marks the return of Charile Huddy to RX1, as he is now an assistant coach with the enemy after being let go by Tambo this summer.

The offensive aspect of the Oilers' home opener wasn't too much to complain about. They showed that they can play physical. They got their noses dirty and generated chances by charging hard to the net and being tenacious on the puck. But I do expect a little bit cleaner play from our squadron this evening on the defensive side of things. Quinn mentioned in the post game comments from Saturday's game that he wasn't terribly thrilled on how his team looked on any of the four goals against. I would have to agree with him. Mostly because he's Pat Fucking Quinn, and also because all four goals against were pretty weak. Except that last one...there was nothing Khabibulin could do on that one. (read: Sarcasm)

Sounds like Nilsson draws into the lineup to replace Moreau who sits tonight with some sort of infection in his foot or something. I dunno. But nothing seems to surprise me anymore when it comes to our Captain and injuries.

The game is being broadcast on PPV tonight. There's an OilersNation.com PPV party with Wanye Gretz and Jason Gregor being held at a swanky new pub "The Pint" at 10125 - 109 Street in E-town. I've been told it's the old Fox and Hounds or something? If I lived within cab ride distance of that place I would be there. But I don't. So I'm just going to continue to pout about it.

Speaking of PPV games... What the fuck is with having the second Oilers game being broadcast as a PPV game? I realize the network/regional tv draw of the Oilers has probably dwindled somewhat since the '06 cup run. But dammit. I don't want to pay for a PPV game so early in the year. I need to see this team in action a few times before I'll commit to dumping 15 bucks on a PPV game. I suppose it's cheaper than "going" to a game...and who am I kidding...I paid for PPV games at the end of the 06-07 season when the team went 2-18 in the final 20 games. One more thing, have you seen the PPV schedule for November? Good lord. There's like 5 of them! I'm going to need to find some friends house(s), bars and/or internet feeds to watch some of those ones. The last thing I need is an extra 75 bucks on my Satellite bill.

Ok then, my guess is Oilers 5, Stars 1. Gagner with the hat trick tonight. Yep...you heard it here first.

-TB